Life without reaching out to others risks only loneliness and disappointment!

2024-09-18 23:52:44 / IDE NGA AGIM BAçI

Life without reaching out to others risks only loneliness and disappointment!

It is a question that we probably ask our children more and more rarely : Do you know that grandparents are not only the parents of the parents, but also a story and an experience of their own, which is worth knowing, even when it seems that things did not go well should, even when they don't have something successful to show, even when there isn't something heroic ?

In fact, if we watch the news, follow the concerns of grandparents and our children's teachers, we can quickly realize that almost all of us have given up as parents a little before our children's endless demands for clothes, electronics , for travel, for endless whims - that is, for everything material.

In the rush of our daily life, we talk very little to them about our previous life, about what we loved and that life gave us a lesson different from what we thought or dreamed.

We ask very little of them to communicate with their grandparents, and even less with their neighbors. " Go home, wash the windows, learn to cook, build something, get a job, visit a sick person, do your homework, and when you're done, read a book. Your country is not obliged to provide you with recreational facilities, nor are your parents only obliged to entertain you. The world owes you nothing, you have to earn your own life. You owe the world something" , wrote some time ago the director of North College in New Zealand, John Tapene, as he asked the young people of his country to give up meaningless entertainment and look to the future.

But this issue raised by the New Zealander Tapene, as a person who contacts students every day, has long been raised by psychologists and philosophers. Thus, the famous Greek neuropsychologist, Nikos Sideris, in his book on communication with children, states that parents should be the ones who should tell children what they can and can't or shouldn't have, like and be judgmental towards what children show in their everyday life.

" It is harmful for the child himself, if their imagination dictates the attitude of the parents" , says Sideris, asking the parents to see the conversation with their children as a conversation with themselves, as another growth.

Meanwhile, the Spanish philosopher Fernando Savater suggests that we teach children that the consequences that come from the freedom to act cannot be denied or disappeared at will. According to Savater, Freedom is not to have everything, but to accept the consequences for better or for worse, depending on what happened to us or what we failed to do.

This lack of communication has made today's parents and children not discuss anything, not even those things that affect them every day or will affect them in the future, especially when they are in their old age.

We must admit that this challenge is not easy at all, but, at least, we have the duty to encourage children to dare to find their own way, assuming their obligations for a dignified life.

To teach them that to err is human, but to ask for forgiveness is even more human. Let's teach them that the crossroads in life are taken when you have a hand by your side, when you can look the other in the eye, and when you understand that you are part of a society where you have your obligations to make it better.

And especially to tell them that life without a hand towards the other, without a hand towards the grandparents, risks having only loneliness and disappointment as a consequence.